Skills for Communicating Effectively

Why is communication so important? Why do we take the time to talk about body language and communication styles? We, as people, have been communicating for centuries. But, as time went on, communication became less than what it used to be. Before we went on dates, talked to people we didn’t know on the streets, etc. You had to talk to communicate. It was the only way we knew how. As technology advanced, however, it became easier to distance ourselves from those around us. With the technological advances, we have gained social media sites such as Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, and so much more. While these websites help us to stay in touch with those who live far away, or even help get news to others quicker, it does have some setbacks. Some people, like myself, used Facebook to let extended family know that my husband and I are expecting our first child.
The problem is, when we get the chance to communicate in person, we spend most of our time on phones and not talking. We don’t even make eye contact. I hear more stories about people being anxious when talking to others, or having to talk on the phone even. We are forgetting how to communicate and read body language, and we are forgetting basic principles. That is why it is important that we talk about communication. It affects our lives and is a huge part of our marriages and family life.

Communication Tips
·         Listening is a core skill if you want to have successful communication in your relationships. When we listen to the people around us, it shows them that what they are saying is important and matters to us (Doyle, 2017).
·         Non-verbal communication is also another skill to master if you want to become a more developed communicator. Non-verbal communication is something we see and feel. It is in our facial expressions and in the movements that we do with our bodies.  These movements suggest different messages to those we are talking with. Eye contact and an open stance when standing and talking with someone is important and shows them you are willing to listen and be friendly (Doyle, 2017).
·         Clarity is a skill that is difficult to obtain when communicating. Being clear in our speaking helps people around us understand what we are saying so we do not have to repeat ourselves many different times. Clarity is asking the right questions and making sure that the words we speak are easy to understand (Doyle, 2017).
·         Friendliness and empathy are two great skills that will allow you to gain a new friend anywhere you go. Smiling and asking those who you are communicating with personal questions that spark their interest. These skills will help others feel you are interested in them. Empathy helps others feel understood and heard (Doyle, 2017).

BODY LANGUAGE

Loud laughter, poor posture, eye contact, head motions, and silence. These different gestures tell a person very quickly in a conversation how you are feeling and what message you are trying to get across. Have you ever wondered why it is that some humans might look away when having a conversation? Can you tell the difference when someone is really listening as they nod their head and when someone is mentally floating away from the conversation? Body language is often overlooked. Research has shown that 55% of a person's communication is from the body language that they use in their conversation (Patel, 2014).



  •    When a conversation is taking place, it is important to make eye contact with the person you are talking with. Eye contact helps both parties in the conversation feel heard. Eye contact also lets the person know in the conversation that you are being present with them (Patel, 2014).

  • ·         How does it make you feel when you are having a conversation with someone and they are right up in your face? Annoying, right? Well, research has shown that it is important and proper to stand 18 inches to 4 feet away from someone when you are having a conversation (Patel, 2014). This creates an environment and atmosphere for the conversation to flow smoothly and in a comfortable manner.
 Do you Connect?
  • ·         It is suggested that we communicate a lot with the people around us, but we do not actually connect as much as we communicate (Schmid, 2015). What does it mean to connect with someone? I am sure it looks different for every person, but a few skills to connect are to acknowledge what the person is saying to you as they are speaking. What kind of words and phrases are they using? A second skill is hear what and how they are saying things (Schmid, 2015).

“Our communications reflect in our countenance. Therefore, we must be careful not only what we communicate, but also how we do so. Souls can be strengthened or shattered by the message and the manner in which we communicate” (L. Lionel Kendrick, in Conference Report, Oct. 1988, 28; or Ensign, Nov. 1988, 23).

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Challenge and Take Away
  • Next time you are having a conversation with someone, think about whether or not you are being very clear in your speaking. Also, ask questions that might reflect to you whether your conversation was clear. Find someone to be friendly with in your day. Being friendly, asking questions, and smiling can help you make a new friend and make someone's day happier.
  • Next time you are talking with your spouse, put your cell phone away and pay attention to them through eye contact. When you are making eye contact with your spouse, it shows them that you are paying attention to what they have to say. It also shows your spouse that you are being present with them and really listening to what they have to say.
  • Next time you are talking with someone, pay more attention to how you are connecting with that person. Are you acknowledging them as they speak and trying to hear what they are saying? Try to connect more often to the people around you.

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                                                                                References

Does Connection Matter? Schmid D. The Anatomy of Communication. Massage Magazine [serial online]. May 2015;(228):60-62. Available from: Alt HealthWatch, Ipswich, MA. Accessed February 9, 2018

 Doyle, A. (2017, November 28). These Are the Communication Skills Employers Look For In Employees. Retrieved February 24, 2018, from https://www.thebalance.com/communication-skills-list-2063779

(Patel, 2014) Does Body Language Matter? Patel, D. d. (2014). Body Language: An Effective Communication Tool. IUP Journal Of English Studies, 9(2), 90-95.


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Skills for Communicating Effectively

Why is communication so important? Why do we take the time to talk about body language and communication styles? We, as people, have been c...